i'm a fool, no?

If you looked at me,

i'd give you a nod,

If you smiled at me,

i'd give you a grin,

If you spoke with me,

i'd tell you a lie,

If you lied to me,

i'd tell you the truth,

If you cared for me,

i'd give you the cold shoulder,

If you ignored me,

i'd be giving you my concerns,

If you hated me,

i'd still be in love for you,

if.... just if you fell for me.....without a modicum of doubt,

i'd definitely abandon you

I'm burdened by overwhelming guilt and disappointed.

I'm burdened by overwhelming guilt and disappointed. Just when I thought things were easing up in my life, a chain of bad event proved me otherwise. Where should I start? Parents perhaps.They seem to be ignoring me recently. My dad does it openly, and my mom tries really hard to make it seem less obvious. I'm not really disturbed by it. But when everyone ignores you....even the coldest person at heart feels a piercing sense of pain.

Next, the first ever monthly test. God....I fell ill on the second day of the exam. What's worse, it was Add Math, Physics and Chemistry! I planned to finish it quickly and have a short nap but time had other plans. The time allocated for each paper was about an hour. It was a ngam ngam oi situation....I wasn't able to catch forty winks. Next,

KDU DATUK CQ TEO NATIONAL DEBATE TOURNAMENT. This years team consisted of myself as the whip speaker, Azim as the prime minister and KJSeng as the deputy prime minister. Despite winning 3 out of the 5 preliminary rounds we didn't get sufficient point to break into the top 16 teams. I feel responsible for the last loss. I could've twisted a single term in the topic that would've definitely secured us a win hands down. All I had to do was say THW allow the media to show nudity in the name of SCIENCE, HEALTH and EDUCATION instead of art. This proves my brain needs more exercise.

I just hope for the sun to shine a little on my side. I would really love to bask down under the yellow glow of its warm ray.....